Primal Rights • View topic - -JOKES-

RAW · **Joined:** Thu Oct 01, 2009 9:38 pm **Posts:** 214

Since one of my favorite things on the Bohica forum was the jokes, I figured I'd start it off here. Even though I don't have any new ones right now. So anybody want to take the lead?

Kevenater · Fri Oct 02, 2009 12:08 am

I will, 99!!!!!!!!!! Now, he's the biggest joke I know!!!!!!! :lol:

GWB · Fri Oct 02, 2009 9:20 am

Ralph came home drunk one night, slid into bed beside his sleeping wife, and fell into a deep slumber.
He awoke before the Pearly Gates, where St. Peter said, 'You died in your sleep, Ralph.'
Ralph was stunned. 'I'm dead? No, I can't be! I've got too much to live for. Send me back!'
St. Peter said, 'I'm sorry, but there's only one way you can go back, and that is as a chicken.'
Ralph was devastated, but begged St. Peter to send him to a farm near his home.

The next thing he knew, he was covered with feathers, clucking, and pecking the ground.
A rooster strolled past. 'So, you're the new hen, huh? How's your first day here?'
'Not bad,' replied Ralph the hen, 'but I have this strange feeling inside.. Like I'm gonna explode!'
'You're ovulating,' explained the rooster.. 'Don't tell me you've never laid an egg before? '
'Never,' said Ralph.
'Well, just relax and let it happen,' says the rooster. 'It's no big deal.'
Ralph did, and a few uncomfortable seconds later, out popped an egg!

Ralph was overcome with emotion as he experienced motherhood. He soon laid another egg -- his joy was overwhelming. As he was about to lay his third egg, he felt a smack on the back of his head, and heard his wife yell......

'Ralph! Wake up you drunken bastard… You shit the bed!'

GWB · Fri Oct 02, 2009 9:22 am

Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl 'Will you marry me?' The girl
said, 'NO!' And the guy lived happily ever after and rode motorcycles
and went fishing bought guns and played golf a lot and drank beer and scotch and left the toilet seat up whenever he wanted.

THE END

orkan · Fri Oct 02, 2009 9:35 am

A bear and a rabbit were taking a shit in the woods.

The bear asked the rabbit: "Excuse me, do you have problems with shit sticking to your fur?"

The rabbit said: "No."

So the bear, wiped his ass with the rabbit.

GWB · Fri Oct 02, 2009 9:46 am

Donald Duck and Daisy Duck were spending the night together in a hotel room and Donald wanted to have sex with Daisy.

The first thing Daisy asked was, 'Do you have a condom?'

Donald frowned and said, 'No.'

Daisy told Donald that if he didn't get a condom, they could not have sex.

'Maybe they sell them at the front desk,' she suggested.
So Donald went down to the lobby and asked the hotel clerk if they had condoms.

'Yes, we do,' the clerk said and pulled a box out from under the counter and gave it to Donald.

The clerk asked, 'Would you like me to put them on your bill?

'No!' Donald quacked, "D'you want me to thuffocate"?

GWB · Fri Oct 02, 2009 9:48 am

A fleeing Taliban, desperate for water, was plodding through the Afghan desert when he saw something far off in the distance. Hoping to find water, he hurried toward the oasis, only to find a little old Jewish man at a small stand, selling ties..

The Taliban asked, 'Do you have water?'

The Jewish man replied, 'I have no water. Would you like to buy a tie? They are only $5..'

The Taliban shouted, 'Idiot! I do not need an over-priced tie. I need water! I should kill you, but I must find water first!

OK,' said the old Jewish man, 'it does not matter that you do not want to buy a tie and that you hate me. I will show you that I am bigger than that. If you continue over that hill to the east for about two miles, you will find a lovely restaurant. It has all the ice cold water you need. Shalom.'

Muttering, the Taliban staggered away over the hill. Several hours later he staggered back, almost dead.

"Your fucking brother won't let me in without a tie. :mrgreen:

Spyder · Fri Oct 02, 2009 11:18 am

Well, lets start this off the right way...

What's black and has thirty six tits?

A trash bag at a breast cancer clinic!!!

Acera · Fri Oct 02, 2009 12:25 pm

Damn Spyder,

:lol:

orkan · Fri Oct 02, 2009 12:53 pm

HAHAHA

damn...

There's the raunchy crew I know and love. hahaha

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